Daryl Van Tongeren, Ph.D., is an Associate Professor of Psychology at Hope College in Holland, Michigan. A social psychologist, he has published over 190 scholarly articles and chapters on topics such as meaning in life, religion, virtues (including forgiveness and humility), relationships, and well-being. His research has been covered by numerous media outlets, including The New York Times, The Chicago Tribune, The Washington Post, Huffington Post, NPR Affiliate Radio Stations, Scientific American, and Men’s Health. He has also coauthored a book on meaning and suffering, written for clinicians and therapists (The Courage to Suffer; D. R. Van Tongeren & S. A. S. Van Tongeren, 2020, Templeton Press). His research has been supported by numerous grants from the John Templeton Foundation to explore topics including humility, meaning in life, and religion and religious de-identification, and his research has won national and international awards. He received a 2016 Rising Star designation from the Association for Psychological Science (APS), and he won the American Psychological Association (APA) Division 36 (Society for Psychology of Religion and Spirituality) Margaret Gorman Early Career Award for 2022. He was named a Fellow of the International Society for Science and Religion (ISSR) and a Fellow of the Midwestern Psychological Association (MPA). Currently, he is an associate editor forThe Journal of Positive Psychology, and a consulting editor for Psychology of Religion and Spirituality and The Journal of Social Psychology. You can find out more about Daryl’s work at darylvantongeren.com and follow him on Instagram @darylvantongeren or Twitter @drvantongeren.
Humble: The Quiet Power of an Ancient Virtue is forthcoming from The Experiment in Spring 2022.
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Humble: The Quiet Power of An Ancient VIrtue by Daryl Van Tongeren, PhD
The Experiment, 2022
A practical and philosophical deep dive into humility: how it can build confidence, foster honesty about our strengths and limitations, and help us achieve success
Narcissism is on the rise: It manifests in our friends, partners, coworkers, politicians—and even, from time to time, in ourselves. But a powerful tool can help us defeat it: humility.
Humble is the antidote that will help us look beyond our own desires. Psychologist Daryl Van Tongeren lays out a three-part path to achieving greater humility, which includes learning to accept feedback, letting go of defensive responses, and, ultimately, building stronger relationships. As Van Tongeren shows through his own experience, even the experts fall down sometimes—and anyone can rise to the challenge.
Rooted in groundbreaking research, this book explores how cultivating humility, an often-undervalued character trait, is the key to a life of meaning and purpose.
*A Greater Good’s Favorite Book of the Year*
“In a world filled with overconfidence, there’s no virtue more underrated than humility. In this lucid, thoughtful book, a leading expert makes a persuasive case for being honest about your weaknesses—and shows how that can be a source of strength.”—Adam Grant, #1 New York Times–bestselling author of Think Again and host of the podcast WorkLife
“A new book on the quiet power of restraint.”—Associated Press
“It used to be that humility was one of the most underestimated of the virtues. Not anymore. Following the latest science, Daryl Van Tongeren shines light on this ancient, old-fashioned virtue in a brand-new way. Unpacking the many meanings, layers and levels of humility, he clearly and compellingly demonstrates why it is so necessary in today’s world. Humility appears to be so small, so modest, so unassuming, so humble. But we should not be deceived by its appearance.”—Robert Emmons, editor-in-chief of The Journal of Positive Psychology and author of The Little Book of Gratitude
“Daryl Van Tongeren has written an important book that can provide a much-needed antidote to the narcissism and the crisis of meaning that pervades our society.”—Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD, New York Times–bestselling author of Happier and Happier, No Matter What
“Narcissism and self-promotion have seduced millions into wasting their lives, pretending to be someone they’re not. But Dr. Van Tongeren shows us a way out: the ancient virtue of humility. If you’re tired of the superficiality of modern life, Humble has the antidote. It’s a road map for getting our feet back on the ground.”—Daniel Z. Lieberman, MD, coauthor of The Molecule of More
“It’s a delightfully ironic fact of science: when you understand the power of humility, you discover a more self-confident way to engage with the world. A superior self through selflessness—who knew?”—Michael E. Long, coauthor of The Molecule of More
“We live in a world where big egos stand out and seemingly get rewarded. In his fantastic new book, Dr. Van Tongeren makes a compelling case for humility as a virtue: It is not about avoiding life, but about confronting ourselves, our relationships, and our world with openness and willingness to accept that we do not hold all the answers. Humble can inspire growth and make for a truly rich life.”—W. Keith Campbell, PhD, author of The New Science of Narcissism
“An enlightening book on a neglected virtue. Backed by scientific research and leavened with helpful anecdotes, Van Tongeren makes a convincing case that humility can improve how we see (and treat) ourselves, others, and the world around us.”—Michael McCullough, professor of psychology, University of California, San Diego, and author of The Kindness of Strangers
“In this increasingly self-absorbed era riddled with selfies and vanity, humility is harder than ever to find. Social psychologist Van Tongeren (Hope Coll.) draws from years of graduate and post-graduate research to define what it means to be humble and how this endangered virtue could bring connection and understanding in a divided and narcissistic world… Readers looking to better understand interpersonal relationships will learn much.”—Library Journal